Thursday, November 6, 2008

{11-09-05}

The bicycle riders out here are a bit crazier than the ones in Manhattan. When you least expect it one flies out of the shadows with a butcher knife and chases you down the street like a chicken getting ready to get its head cut off. Not more than two seconds later there's a lady and a man battling at it in the streets like a wild rhinoceros and a giraffe with a shorter neck than most. Just witnessing these events on the mass grand scale is enough to drive one to the nuthouse. Every second seems like a movie moment on a mass scale grandeur. 

Tender broiled thighs walk down the street and I just don't understand what people see in fat people and I mean no harm in saying this because I do know a few fat bastards out there in the world who have the biggest hearts that any man or woman would want. That kind of heart that melts brain receptors and drives you into a mad frenzy so that when finally all things go wrong and not one moment that has passed by has gone well. 

You know you just got yourself into some real deep trauma from all past experiences. It's just a really bad movie played over and over again. Each time its set up with a new set of circumstances and new character developments that you would never have expected. That is why I am faced with the decision to leave all these yellow cabs and red street lights and seek refuge in a new place and time where new experiences will let me know if this is just another place to stay or another place to leave.

I take a look-down Flushing Ave. and the horizon down there in the southernmost part of Brooklyn. I see nothing more. Time is just one of those things you can't cash in on no matter what you have done to span those stretches apart or close together. I am not even sure at points if the things I wrote down are really worth anything to anyone anyways. Why would anyone want to read about things that they have nothing to do with or authors they will never know or anyone else but themselves for all that matters. 

When I finally cash in all my winnings from whatever happens from the big gambles that are about to take place I will only hope that some sort of difference was made. That there was some impact in someone's life so that they could feel the happiness on an authentic level. So they could look out windows and not be scared of the outside world or the people in this place because some of these people are pretty wretched but some are truly free.